We are talking about when parents should submit to their own children!

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Ephesians 5:21Submit to one another in the fear of Christ.”

What happens when a parent hits their child in anger and the child corrects them? A child who follows Jesus has God the Son (Jesus), God the Father, and God the Holy Spirit living inside them. You should be very fearful of what Jesus will do if you strike your child unfairly. In my own experience my children corrected me as I made this mistake, and I realized Jesus was confronting me through my kid’s words. Submit to the truth even if the messenger is your own child.

Story: 4 year old Leah corrected me. In this case it was actually my fault. The sheep pen has a boundary to guard the sheep, and I had set boundaries for my 4 year old, Leah. She was testing every boundary to see if it really was true. You know. Count to 10 and the child will wait till 10 before taking action. Leah had learned the boundaries. But I changed one boundary without making sure Leah understood. It was my fault Leah crossed the changed boundary, but I couldn’t see that I hadn’t given her the time to learn the new standard. In my anger I began to punish her. She had this calm about her as I spanked her and she calmly confronted me as tears ran down her cheeks. Jesus clearly spoke to me through her in that moment. I caught myself raising my arm and looking at her as I heard her words. In my mind I heard something like, “She is right Bob. It’s your fault.” I felt horrible instantly. I was so embarrassed. I hugged her and cried as I asked her to forgive me.

When should you stop spanking? Leah’s ability to reason with the truth came way earlier than Noah. I would ask Noah, “Noah, explain your reason for doing this. Why did you do this?” and his answer was, “I don’t know.” You should stop spanking about the time when your kids can reason with the truth. I am pretty sure Noah and Leah didn’t like the process of discovering the truth. After the awkward surrender to what really happened, then they would want to move on. They wanted to go play again. Our intentional sacrifice of time to solve their problems was laying a foundation of love. We loved them enough to work the problems out for however long it took. As the years went by I noticed our conversations in pursuit of the truth became part of our daily life.

Prayer coaching: “Jesus Show me what is really going on with my kids. First, is it my fault? Did I make a mistake? Help me discover the truth. And if the truth is not easily discovered, give me the wisdom to know when to show mercy. Jesus help me not lose my temper or get angry when I discipline them. Even if they are guilty and deserve punishment, show me what You want me to do.”